A significant proportion of my life revolves around crafts and the idea of things being home made, it sends me into a frenzied state of excitement. God help anyone who enters hobbycraft with me hoping for a quick exit. Generally I crochet and sew, but I have dabbled in other crafts such as papercrafts, jewellery making, knitting and embroidery. I nearly always have a project on the go and I often partake in craft swaps through http://www.craftster.org/ .
Unfortunately my crafting time has been cut down significantly from working full time. I used to take my stuff with me to do on my lunch breaks but got fed up with comments made, particularly when crocheting, so it's something I do more in private now. Like a dirty little secret. It's amazing however when I finish and use projects, the response I tend to get is more along the lines of "wow"!
This year I'm particularly excited for my birthday because I'm expecting a sewing machine of my very own, I think my mum is getting fed up with her sewing machine living in my room. Unfortunately I still have three months to go...
My latest project takes the form of the above dress, (image taken from http://voguepatterns.mccall.com/v1102-products-9938.php?page_id=854 ) I've now cut out all my pieces and bought all my findings. I'm awaiting the instructions from my cousin (who is also making the dress) and then I will get cracking!
Things I have made in the past include:
Hot water bottle covers for friends christmas presents
Crocheted bib neclace embellished with faux pearls.
Bookmarks
Crocheted driving gloves
Stencilled t-shirt
There's much much more but I'm quite bad at documenting my achievements. We'll have to wait and see how this current project works out.
This is me, aged 18, a size 10-12 with not a speck of make-up on my face and only a comb run through my hair, make-up and hair-styling products were tools of weakness as far as I was concerned. This is what I'm aiming for. I was sat on the floor at my first ever gig and I can't remember a time where I felt more comfortable with my image. At this time I'd been with Tom for more than six months, I was going through my "rock" phase where I lived in jeans and t-shirts from h&m and I felt I looked good. On the other hand I was quiet, retiring and had no idea how to talk to people in large groups. I'd never been to a gig before this photo was taken, I certainly didn't dance or sing along, new situations were something I tried to avoid at all costs. Little did I know how things would change.
At the bottom is me now, aged 23. You'd think I look like I'm having a great time and I love the way I look, you'd be wrong. I'm at a point in my life where I've never been so low in confidence about my image. I regularly delete photos if I'm posed incorrectly and I'm constantly comparing myself to other girls, adament that they're commenting about me behind my back (infact some have made comments to my face, which knocks me back even further). I'm a size bigger than when I was 18, I won't leave the house with perfectly primped hair and a face of make-up and I still don't feel in any way shape or form - pretty. It doesn't matter how many times those who love me tell me I look good, my brain won't grasp this concept. As a result I quite often get my image wrong and I'm just learning to know what suits me and what doesnt. A favourite quote of mine is "I'm too fat to wear that". On the other hand when it comes to being an adult and taking control of my life, my confidence has soared, I will talk to anyone about anything and I have no issues about approaching strangers or standing up for what I believe in - I don't want to lose this, it's taken me years to have that kind of self-assurance.
I realise I have a problem and I'm trying to rectify it, I want the body confidence of my 18yr self with the self assurance of my 23yr old self. Is this too much to ask?
I came to create this blog because I've read so many other wonderful people's accounts of their lives and I feel it's a fantastic way to document a stage in my life where I feel I'm on a journey. Many of you reading this will know that I'm a nurse and for that reason I will need to remain within professional boundaries, but that's not what this blog is about. It's about me, about who I am, how I came to be here and where I want to be.
So who am I? I'm Jenn, one thing you'll learn about me very fast is that I despise being called Jenny and actually prefer being called Jennifer, but due to the consistent laziness of the general population it seems an impossibility to get people to spit out two extra syllables, so Jenn will suffice. Another thing that becomes apparent very quickly after meeting me, is I like pink; I'm twenty-three and have yet to grow out of this phase. Hence the name of my blog. I'm actually quite proud of the fact I now own my first phone that isn't pink and doesn't have a pink cover, although my car, many of my shoes and clothes and even my stethoscope are still pink. Other things to note, I love crafts (I sew and crochet mainly), shoes and bags are my guilty pleasures, I hate the way I look whatever my size, I love to help, I love rodents and there's much more still...
